Beer Quotes and Alcohol Quotes

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He once had his toes amputated so he could stand closer to the bar.

Mike HardingI smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.

George Burns

I got to piss like a Russian Race Horse!

Steve Roose

"Hey he's not old enough to drink."

"No mom, he's not old enough to buy..."

Justin Frechette

I don't like people who take drugs... Customs men for example.

Mick Miller

All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer.

Homer Simpson

No animal ever invented anything as bad as drunkenness - or as good as drink.

G.K. Chesterton

Drinking provides a beautiful excuse to pursue the one activity that truly gives me pleasure, hooking up with fat, hairy girls.

Ross Levy

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.

Jack Handy

To alcohol, the cause of and solution to, all life's problems.

Homer Simpson

What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?

W.C. Fields

In wine there is wisdom. In beer there is strength. In water there is bacteria.

Old German Proverb

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.

Hunter S. Thompson

Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.

Rob in Williams

There is an ancient Celtic axiom that says 'Good people drink good beer.' Which is true, then as now. Just look around you in any public barroom and you will quickly see: Bad people drink bad beer. Think about it.

Hunter S. Thompson

Prohibition is better than no liquor at all.

Will Rogers

I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me.

W.C. Fields

We're in such a slump that even the ones that are drinkin' aren't hittin'.

Casey Stengel

When the hour is nigh,

Let me in a tavern die,

With a tankard by me.

Archpoet

"Confesio"

12th century

Alcohol is a very necessary article. It enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no sane person would do at eleven in the morning.

George Bernard Shaw

A wise man once said "Never mix beer and hard liquor.... unless you've only got one glass."

Beer is the fountain of happiness.

Light beer is an invention of the Prince of Darkness.

Inspector Morse

Mystery

Payday came and with it beer.

Rudyard Kipling

Beer brewers shall sell no beer to the citizens, unless it be three weeks old; to the foreigner they may knowingly sell younger beer.

German beer law, 1466

If the hangover preceded the binge, alcoholism would be considered a virtue and not a vice.

Gregory Bateson

For we could not now take time for further search (to land our ship) our victuals being much spent, especially our Beer.

Ship's log of the Mayflower

But the greatest love--the love above all loves, even greater than that of a mother... Is the tender, passionate, undying love, of one beer drunken slob for another.

Irish love ballad

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Complete list of beer quotes and alcohol quotes brought to you by Power Hour™ LLC.  Power Hour™ is rated the number one drinking game in the world.  This is the best drinking game according to many of Power Hour™ customers. Complete list of beer quotes and alcohol quotes brought to you by Power Hour™ LLCPower Hour™ is rated the number one drinking game in the world.  This is the best drinking game according to many of Power Hour™ customers.